A couple of weeks ago, Kate and I ran the ‘Fearless Readings for Writers’ live module for the first time. It’s very important to us that we deliver measurable results, so on arrival, each participant was given a questionnaire that included ten negative and ten positive statements (specific to reading their work in public) and asked to rate how true each one was for them on a scale of 1 to 5. Two and a half hours later, we gave them an identical questionnaire and asked them to rate each statement again. Today, I finally had time to collate and average results, so we can see the overall picture.
Negative Feelings
There were ten negative statements:
- I hate reading my work in public
- I’m worried what the audience with think of me/my writing
- I’m afraid the audience will feel sorry for me
- I’m scared my writing will turn out to be rubbish when I’m reading
- I’m scared the audience won’t clap
- I’m afraid I won’t get recognition for my efforts
- I’m worried I’ll forget what I’m going to say
- I’m afraid I will stutter/stammer/blush/shake/get a nervous rash
- I had bad reading/performance experiences at school or elsewhere
- Even the thought of reading my work in public makes me feel ill
1 = not true
2 = not very true
3 = sort of
4 = quite true
5 = completely true
As you can see, all negative emotions/beliefs have been significantly reduced, in every case but one softened to below the “sort of” (3) line. And the one statement which, on average, became more true as a result of the session is rather telling: the process we use to help writers read fearlessly brings into focus (and eliminates) the emotional charge associated with previous bad experiences (among other things), so “I had bad reading/performance experiences at school or elsewhere” rose in two cases (in one, from a 1 (not true) to a 4 (quite true)) because the process had revealed a bad experience they had forgotten about, or realised they had lessened in importance. It’s not a bad thing, to remember/accept that you’ve had bad reading or performances experiences before, so long as one can eliminate any effect that might have on future events!
Averaging, of course, masks some quite spectacular individual transformations. For the statement “I’m afraid I will stutter/stammer/blush/shake/get a nervous rash”, for example, two participants went from 5 (completely true) and 4 (quite true) to 1 (not true). Two people reported that “I’m worried I’ll forget what I have to say” had fallen from 5 (completely true) to 2 (not very true). One person’s “I’m afraid the audience will feel sorry for me” fell from a 4 (quite true) to a 1 (not true).
Positive Feelings
Most of what we concentrate on is (permanently) reducing, and ideally eliminating, negative beliefs and negative emotions around a challenge (in this case, reading in public). But you also find that as negativity reduces, positivity is created automatically. (For example, we didn’t work on fear of using a microphone at all, but it has nevertheless benefited!) The positive statements we tested before and after were:
- I feel confident about my ability to read my work in public
- I think I can feel okay about myself no matter what happens
- It is okay to draw attention to myself
- It doesn’t matter what people think, everyone has different opinions
- My confidence is not damaged by other people’s opinions
- I am happy to stand up and share my work with others
- I know the audience are on my side
- I feel safe reading my work to an audience
- I am confident about speaking into a microphone
- I can be myself on stage
What we’re looking for here, of course, is for all of the positive statements to become more true than they were before – and that’s true for every statement except No.6, “I am happy to stand up and share my work with others” which remained unchanged (averaged out) at a 3 (“sort of”). But this no-change scenario should be balanced against striking improvements in “I think I can feel okay about myself no matter what happens” and “It is okay to draw attention to myself”. For all but one statement, the average response improved as far as”sort of” and edged up (very closely in two cases) to “quite true”.
Averaging, again, masks some powerful individual experiences. ”I think I can feel okay about myself no matter what happens” and “My confidence is not damaged by other people’s opinions” rose from 1 (not true) to 4 (quite true) in one individual.
General Feedback
We asked people to identify one important thing they’d received from attending. Comments included:
- Little tips that are personal, identifying a major issue. Sharing with others.
- The ability to calm myself down and put the fears into perspective.
- It was calming to do the tapping and useful to identify and deal with the different areas of my fear.
- Getting past caring about e.g. blushing – but seeing real issues more clearly. (I don’t have to do this).
- Getting nearer to embodiment, towards ownership of what I write.
Two reported feeling much more present in their bodies than they had before. (Some people, in a fearful situation, will ”detach’ from the experience). When asked if they enjoyed the workshop, every participant answered ‘Yes’. We got a similar 100% ‘Yes’ response when asked if they would recommend it to others.
Not many people are used to the kind of rapid and lasting improvements that EFT tapping and similar techniques can deliver, so most of the participants, understandably, wanted to test themselves in live ‘scary’ reading/performance situation before offering full-blooded testimonials. We did stage a small reading for those of us present, where everyone reported significant improvements, but since we’d all got to know each other a bit by then, we felt it didn’t have the proper fear-factor.
But this Saturday just gone, the first of our participants to be faced with a public performance/reading sent me a text. Before attending our workshop, she said fear of forgetting her words had become such an issue that she had completely stopped enjoying performing (even though this is her living), and had being turning down performance opportunities.
“Ros, just to let you know that you re a geniuuus, and that altho I had the standard terror [I checked with her; she means adrenaline rush!] abt performing today, practically none of it had to do with forgetting words, and it went brilliantly, and I felt relaxed and confident and really enjoyed it! Woohooooooo !”
If you want to know when we’re running this module next, or would be interested in the online version of “Fearless Readings for Writers” when its ready later this year, sign up for our mailing list. Kate and I also do one-to-one sessions in person, by phone, or via Skype, if your need is more urgent. Contact us for further details.
